Sebastian is my eleven-year-old and he says some of the funniest things–we have no idea where he gets his material since his mother and I are rather boring, serious people. 

Me: “Nathan, you need to sit up straight! Don’t slouch over your food like that!”

This caused Sebastian to break out laughing as he takes particular delight in any criticism of his brother.

Me: “I would suggest you be quiet, you’re not any better.”

To this, he extended his arm, palm facing toward me, directing me to stop.

Sebastian: “All I heard was ‘you’re’ and ‘better’.”