Sebastian is my twelve-year-old and he says some of the funniest things–we have no idea where he gets his material since his mother and I are rather boring, serious people. 

During the lockdown, I spent a lot of time with the boys as they were schooling remotely. One morning, when Sebastian came down during a break, I noticed a very unattractive sheen to his hair.

Me: “When’s the last time you had a shower?”

Seba: “Yesterday?”

Me: “There’s no way, your hair is downright nasty.”

Sebastian took a moment to ponder.

Seba: “Yeah, l think it was maybe four days ago.”